Jo Martin: Corsets, cocktails and fishing line

Jo Martin, clinical director at Mapperley Park Clinic, is not impressed by some of the latest health and beauty trends.
So a new year has begun and, like everybody, I am regretting my over-indulgence over the festive period and looking for ways to make amends.
However, I am not downhearted because a quick trawl through the aesthetic magazines news sections brings me potential answers to all my woes.
The first is called ‘waist training’ and involves the Victorian idea of wearing tight corsets, otherwise known as cinchers, which eventually cause the abdomen to mimic the shape of a cincher.

 

We are told that waist training requires dedication, but the manufacturers are non-specific about exactly how long it takes to train our waists. I thought we had left restrictive clothing of this kind behind when women got the vote, but apparently Kim and Khloe Kardashian are fans, so that shows how wrong I am.
Another apparently wonderful new idear from the US is to hook ourselves up to intravenous drips and have vitamin cocktails pumped directly into our blood stream.
I love a good cocktail as much as the next, but there is only one way it is entering my body, and it is not through a vein.
There are a number of different formulations and, depending on where you go to have the procedure, if you don’t get blood poisoning or have an anaphylactic attack due to allergy to one of the components being injected directly into your blood stream, then they can make you feel much better. I might just stick with my multi-vits, thanks.
Meanwhile threadlifting, which basically involves the insertion of something resembling fishing line into your face, is making a major comeback, apparently, with new versions promising lift and collagen production after a 30-60 minute clinic procedure, which then lasts for about a year.
Most of the original versions are ‘no longer available’ and I have to say that I still remain to be convinced of the benefits for aesthetic reasons.
By now you could be forgiven for thinking that the whole world of aesthetics has just gone crazy, with celebrities persuading us to do strange things to ourselves, but happily most of us still have our feet firmly on the ground. The ground may be suffering due to the excess Christmas weight, but some sensible eating, some exercise and some excellent skin care products and treatments will always save the day.